26 Best Funny Anniversary Cards For Your Husband

After another year around the sun, it is time to celebrate another anniversary with your husband. Whether you’re freshly married and still in the throes of young love, or whether you’re way past that honeymoon stage, this list provides 26 options for funny anniversary cards that can relay any message you would like to send. Tell them how much you love them, why you love them or how you can barely stand them with these cards that are sure to get a laugh. 

1. A couple that watches Parks & Rec together, stays together. 

If you are one of those couples who enjoy relaxing in front of the TV and watching shows like The Office and Parks & Recreation, then he’ll understand the reference. Plus, who wouldn’t want their significant other to express their love through Ron Swanson?

Purchase the Meat Tornado card for $4.99 at Sleazy Greetings.  

 

2. The couple that knows their limits.

In any relationship, it is important to know what activities you and your partner are capable of doing. If the idea of scaling Mount Everest is beyond the realm of possibility for either of you, and if even the thought of it makes you chuckle, then this is the card for you. So fill up a glass of wine, grab a blanket and put on the movie “Everest”. Watch other people be crazy enough to do it while snuggled up with your husband in the comfort of your own home. 

Purchase the Never Do This card for $5.95 at Always Fits. 

 

3. A perfect combination.

Everyone knows that the way to a woman’s heart is through food and compliments, for the most part at least. Let your husband know that you commend him for his success. 

Purchase the Thanks For Feeding Me card for $6.99 on Amazon. 

 

4. The double-edged sword.

Besides deciding where to eat, this is always the never ending dilemma. If you and your husband find yourselves wishing to go out when you’re home and wishing to be home when you’re out, then here’s the best card to celebrate another year of this vicious cycle. 

Purchase the Dichotomy of Marriage card for $4.95 at Noble Works. 

 

5. 21st century love story.

In this new age of technology everything can be found on the internet, even true love. If you’re relationship started with one of the many dating options available online, let them know that out of all the things available at your fingertips on Amazon, he’s still you’re favorite find.    

Purchase the Best Thing on the Internet card for $4.99 here at SleazyGreetings.com

 

6. The love that grows. 

If you’ve been together for some time, let your husband know that with each passing year you’re love has only gotten stronger. 

Purchase the Big Love card for $2.99 at the Comedy Card Company. 

 

7. The child-like love. 

Everyone has licked something as a kid to claim it as their own and if they say they haven’t, they’re a liar. If you and your husband are young kids at heart, give him this funny anniversary card that is a perfect balance of cute and slightly naughty, which we’re sure he’ll love. 

Purchase the I Licked it so it’s Mine card for $4.99 here on SleazyGreetings.com. 

 

8. The reason you’re cold at night.

If your husband complains every morning about the blanket thief that you are, remind him that you don’t care and that he’s stuck with you with this card. He’ll find it funny until the next time he wakes up at 3 a.m. because he’s cold.  

Purchase the Steal Bed Covers card for $4.99 at Sleazy Greetings. 

 

9. An unselfish love. 

Everyone knows the story of the Titanic and the debates the movie spurred in regards to whether Jack could’ve fit on the door. Time even posted an article outlining multiple theories led by Mythbusters, students from Australia and even an astrophysicist. Regardless of their theories and whether or not the door would’ve held, let your husband know that you love him enough to scooch over. 

Purchase the Titanic Love card for $4.95 at The Card Bureau on Etsy. 

 

10. The ultimate test. 

Being stuck in quarantine with the same person for months can really be the test of time when it comes to love. If you and your husband survived the ordeal without divorcing or killing each other, you can survive anything! Celebrate your everlasting love with this card. 

Purchase the Lockdown card for $2.99 at the Comedy Card Company. 

 

11. An expression of complete devotion. 

The love that any couple strives for. If there was ever a successful step-by-step guide on how to stay happily married, Gomez and Morticia would be the authors. 

Purchase the Addams Family card for $4.08 at Thortful. 

 

12. Scientific love. 

Whether your husband is a science buff or not, he will get a kick out of this funny anniversary card. A sexual pun is always sure to make him smile. 

Purchase the Periodically Do You on a Table card for $2.99 at the Comedy Card Company. 

 

13. The passive love. 

If the two of you are past confessing your undying love for each other, or find it fun to express it in crude ways because you’re different like that, then this is the perfect card to commence another year together!

Purchase the Obligatory Anniversary Card for $2.51 at Sarah Burns Prints on Etsy. 

 

14. A sign of true love. 

Any couple that has a dog knows that it is the most loved being in the household. By giving your husband this card, he will finally know that you don’t love the dog more than him, and that’s really saying something. 

Purchase the As Much As The Dog card for $4.99 at Sleazy Greetings. 

 

15. …Unless it’s a cat household.

If you’re more of a cat person then here’s a perfect card for you! Complete with a poem that even matches the personality of your lil’ feline friend, it’s sure to make your husband laugh because of it’s blunt honesty.  

Purchase the Cat’s My Favorite card for $4.99 at Sleazy Greetings. 

 

16. A mutually beneficial relationship. 

While this may be more directed at the anniversaries that have already seen a few years, it is still applicable to any relationship. Remind them that for every thing that annoys them about you, you have something for them (dirty socks don’t belong on the floor), but through it all you still love them. 

Purchase the Wonder How You Put Up With Me card for $3.76 from Quote Queen Cards on Etsy. 

 

 

17. A love as necessary as caffeine. 

It starts out innocent and the ending will surely have your husband laughing. This funny anniversary card not only pokes fun at the caffeine addiction that most adults have, but also adds a little spice. 

Purchase the How I Like My Coffee for $4.60 at In A Nutshell. 

 

18. Too-late-to-return type of love.

Remind your husband that you’ve both passed the 30-Day Return Policy and you’re stuck with each other now. 

Purchase the I Think I’ll Keep You card for $4.45 at Sweets and Sarcasm on Etsy.

 

19. The love challenged by chores.

Reel him in with the cute beginning and then get him with the zinger when he’s unsuspecting. I won’t promise that he’ll load the dishwasher right in the future, but at least he’ll find this card funny. 

Purchase the You Load the Dishwasher Wrong card for $4.08 at Thortful.

 

20. A love healthier than Carole Baskin’s.

This is a compliment to any husband. For how crazy he may drive you, let him know that he’d never push you to the Carole Baskin point. 

Purchase the Feed You to the Tigers card for $4.99 at Sleazy Greetings. 

 

21. Cute but raunchy love. 

Another card with an innocent beginning and a sexual end, perfect if you plan on taking the anniversary celebration to the bedroom right away. 

Purchase the Rainstorm card for $5.95 at Trap Card Studio on Etsy. 

 

22. The everlasting love

Contrary to the previous card, this one starts out innocent and keeps its course. Let your husband know that you already plan on being in love with him for as long as it takes him to organize his drawers. And by that I mean, forever. 

Purchase the Still Be In Love card for $5.95 at Always Fits. 

 

23. The honest love. 

In this day and age, the first statement is kind of true. The world is going to sh** and everything kind of sucks, but at least you have him. This card is a perfect reminder, for the both of you, that it’s the only thing that really matters. 

Purchase the Everything Sucks Except You card for $6.00 at Space Pig Press on Etsy. 

 

24. One of the best parts of any relationship (a bigger closet).

Let’s be real here, guys’ hoodies just fit better. If he’s constantly asking where that one hoodie of his is that you’ve been wearing for months, then give him this card. He’ll know that he shares your love equally with his clothes. 

Purchase the Love Your Hoodies card for $6.59 on Moon Pig.

 

25. The love that began with a swipe-right. 

Celebrate finding your husband with the ease of dating apps rather than waiting at a bar stool for a stranger to come up and offer some lame pick-up line. While simultaneously reminding him how lucky he is that he swiped right and not left. 

Purchase the Online Dating card for $5.99 at Kraft Street Paper Co. on Etsy.

 

26. Appreciating the little things. 

I’ve yet to meet a man that does not transform into a furnace when he sleeps, leading to the belief that a man’s sole purpose in life is to keep his loved one’s warm. Remind him how grateful you are for his surplus of heat that leads to your good nights sleep!

Purchase the Warm Feet card for $4.08 at Thortful.