Sleazy Greetings funny greeting card with “I’d miss you if you were hit by a bus” humor, featuring a hand-drawn yellow bus illustration on premium matte cardstock with kraft envelope.
Sleazy Greetings funny greeting card with “I’d miss you if you were hit by a bus” humor, featuring a hand-drawn yellow bus illustration on premium matte cardstock with kraft envelope.
Inside view of a Sleazy Greetings funny Valentine’s Day greeting card showing blank interior space for a handwritten message, printed on premium matte cardstock with kraft envelope.
Sleazy Greetings funny greeting card with “I’d miss you if you were hit by a bus” humor, featuring a hand-drawn yellow bus illustration on premium matte cardstock with kraft envelope.
Sleazy Greetings funny greeting card size guide showing 5x7 inch dimensions, featuring sarcastic “I’d miss you if you were hit by a bus” humor on premium matte cardstock.
Sleazy Greetings funny greeting card with sarcastic “I’d miss you if you were hit by a bus” humor, featuring a hand-drawn yellow bus illustration on premium matte cardstock with kraft envelope.
Sleazy Greetings funny greeting card featuring the sarcastic phrase “I’d miss you if you were hit by a bus” with a hand-drawn yellow bus illustration and kraft envelope. Premium adult humor love and friendship card printed on thick matte cardstock in the USA, perfect for boyfriend, girlfriend, spouse, best friend, Valentine’s Day, anniversary, or gag gift occasions.
Sleazy Greetings funny greeting card featuring the sarcastic phrase “I’d miss you if you were hit by a bus” with a hand-drawn yellow bus illustration and kraft envelope. Premium adult humor love and friendship card printed on thick matte cardstock in the USA, perfect for boyfriend, girlfriend, spouse, best friend, Valentine’s Day, anniversary, or gag gift occasions.
Sleazy Greetings funny greeting card with “I’d miss you if you were hit by a bus” humor, featuring a hand-drawn yellow bus illustration on premium matte cardstock with kraft envelope.
Sleazy Greetings funny greeting card with “I’d miss you if you were hit by a bus” humor, featuring a hand-drawn yellow bus illustration on premium matte cardstock with kraft envelope.
SG001209

I'd Miss You Girl Version | Funny Valentine's Day Card

8k+ cards bought in the past month

$ 6.00 USD

Guaranteed to get a laugh 😂

Printed

in the USA

$1.95 Stamp Mail

Envelope

included

Human-designed

artwork
Quantity

Description

Show your love and humor this Valentine's Day with our "I'd Miss You Girl Version" card! Playfully implying that you would miss your girlfriend or wife if they were hit by a bus, this card is perfect for both romantic and quirky couples. Make them smile and feel loved!

Celebrate Valentine’s Day and anniversaries with our I'd Miss You Girl Version funny Valentine’s greeting card — perfect for significant others when you want to show love with humor for a special occasion or just because. Printed in Colorado, USA on eco-friendly, high-quality matte cardstock, this premium Valentine’s card is blank inside for a personal message and includes a recycled kraft envelope, making it an ideal funny Valentine’s Day card, sarcastic anniversary card, and unique romantic greeting card. 
 
PRODUCT DETAILS:
  • Size: 5 x 7 inches
  • Inside: Blank
  • Paper: Thick, durable matte cardstock
  • Print Location: Printed in Colorado, USA
  • Envelope: Includes 1 kraft brown envelope (30% Post-Consumer Waste recycled paper)
  • Packaging: Sealed in a reusable clear plastic sleeve
  • Barcode: UPC barcode printed on back
Retail-ready and easy to merchandise, this card is a great fit for gift shops, boutiques, and bookstores.

Product Features

Shipping & Processing

We’re fast, but also a small business. Orders ship within 1-2 business days, and you’ll get your package in about 2–5 business days after that if you choose tracking with shipping.

We offer budget shipping with stamp letter mail for $1.95 via the USPS First Class Mail that takes 7-14 days for delivery.

 

All cards are shipped straight from our card shop in Centennial, Colorado. Oh, and if you spend over $30, you’ll get free shipping! 🎉

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What customers are saying

see bottom of page for a full list of product reviews

boring cards are for boring people.

We mix high-quality materials with even higher-quality jokes — printed in the USA, eco-friendly, and guaranteed to make someone’s day a little more inappropriate.

Featured in 800+ stores including:

BOLD GIFTS FOR BOLD PEOPLE

Sleazy Greetings started in a college dorm with one guy who just wanted cards that actually sounded like real people. Today, we’re here to help you say the hilarious, heartfelt, and sometimes wildly inappropriate things that make your people feel seen.

LOVED ON TIKTOK

Tag us @sleazy_greetings on TikTok and you could end up here too.

Frequently Asked Questions

Before You Ask... Here's What's on Everyone's Mind!

What is your shipping policy?

 

We carefully ship all orders out within 1-2 business days via USPS after payment is received. If requested, we can send it with a pigeon...maybe.

Are the packages discreet?

 

Yes, all other packages are discreet. Only our return address is visible on the shipping labels.

How much is shipping? 

 

Shipping starts at $2.95 USD or free shipping on orders over $35.

Where are your cards made?

 

Just outside of Denver, Colorado! Our amazing team prints and packages every card by hand.

How big are your cards?

 

The majority of our cards are 5 inches by 7 inches, which leaves plenty of room to write your message and large enough to fit a standard sized photo. A few of our plain text cards are 4.25 inches x 5.5 inches.

Does it come with an envelope?

 

Yes, of course! All cards come with it's own envelope. Our envelopes are sturdy kraft light-brown envelopes and are self-self with an adhesive strip.

Do you offer personalization?

 

Sadly, no we do not offer personalization or handwritten messages inside.