Here's Your Damn Card

Laugh. Cry. Maybe pee a little. Our cards have that effect. Cards so cheeky, they come with a raised eyebrow guarantee. 

$ 5.50 USD

Please allow 1-2 business days for processing.

Introducing the best witty birthday card you’ve ever seen! Whoever invented the idea of “birthday cards” surely didn’t know just how damn popular you were! Thankfully this funny card caters to a wide range of audiences, making the job easy for you. Send this piece of magic to that sarcastic someone on their special day —a friend, family member, husband, wife, boyfriend, girlfriend, co-worker, fiance, significant other... Sure to produce a laugh, this high-quality card is printed on black recycled card stock with white lettering and topped with a matte coating. 

- Inside says, "You're welcome. Now leave me alone."
- A7 size (5" x 7")
- Printed in Montana, USA on matte paper stock
- Comes with a matching kraft envelope made from 30% Post-Consumer Waste recycled paper

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