That’s right, we’re talking about the question that most long—term couples end up asking their relationships at some point. This question is a popular one and is asked more often than would you think. Sometimes it’s from couples who have noticed that life gets ahold of them and their sex life is suffering. Perhaps it’s from the couple whose children have just left the home and they’re trying to rekindle the passion they had once before.
Everyone has their own reasons for wanting to spice things up in the bedroom. More importantly, we all have different versions of “spice”. I mean, we do live in the 50 Shades of Grey fandom where BDSM and kink have now been commercialized. So, whips and chains may excite you, but that’s not how we’re looking to spice.
Slow It Down
The couples we are addressing are the ones with busy lives, where work and family overtake them. A kiss to the partner here and there, the “wham, bam, thank you ma’am!” couples. It can be overwhelmingly hard to ignite the flame when you’re both exhausted by the end of the day.
Here are 5 ways you can spice up your sex life and relationship right now.
I know what you’re thinking. But hear me out. Over 80% of women say they enjoy sex more with a lubricant. But we’re also not just talking any lubricant. Stay off the shelves of your drug stores and department stores and class it up a little.
Lubes can be a fun and exciting way to spice up your relationship. I encourage you to try out a warming lubricant. Many warming lubricants can be flavored (and the flavor is goooood) and used for sensual massage as well. Warming lubricants allow things to heat up a little without making them too hot.
Another great option to spicing up your relationship is the various potions sex shops have to offer. Most of these potions come in forms such as creams, sprays, and gels. For the woman who is self-conscious of what you can give after having a bunch of kids, surprise your man with the use of a tightening cream. These allow the walls of the vagina to shrink temporarily, making a tight, yet pleasurable fit (Always use a lube).
There’s a lot of fun and sexy games on the market in the adult industry world. Back in the day, a sex game was thought of as a few dice rolled to tell you what to do to your partner. But we live in the age of the internet, and the internet has other options.
A similar, more updated version of the dinosaur dice is a downloadable app called Pleasure Machine. This is an app that shows a slot machine (like from Vegas) and randomly spins sexual suggestions and a time limit.
One of the biggest issues during sex and especially a sex rut is the lack of foreplay. For many couples, foreplay is non-existent. In the female world, it’s no surprise that men don’t take the time out for foreplay. But, as someone that’s worked in sexual industry before, I can say that more men are being turned on to the idea of foreplay.
Sex shouldn’t be a get in- get-out thing…unless you’re going for a quickie which can be hot all by itself. And I do realize, not everyone has the time for 30 mins of foreplay. We’ve got work schedules and kiddos, not to mention we’re all permanently exhausted. But instead of lying in bed with each of you staring at your phone, take some time to initiate some foreplay. I guarantee that sex will be better.
My last simple tip to spice up your relationship is to change the location of where you’re having sex. Now, this doesn’t apply to all relationships, but if you’re looking at ways to spice your sex up, chances are it’s probably getting boring.
If there’s one thing I’ve noticed, a change of location can quickly turn a not-so-hot encounter into a tear-off your clothes experience. If you guys are always having sex in the bed, why not move it to the floor? And I’m not talking about the bedroom floor.
Do it somewhere different! I’m not necessarily saying in public. We don’t want you guys to get arrested. But you’ve probably got a few rooms in your house. Do it on the washer, over the edge of the couch, against the wall, on the kitchen counter. Think location, location, location!
I hope you’ve enjoyed my 5 Simple Ways to spice up your relationship. While they might not be the most intricate ways to spice it up, they are simple and can be done with a cheap budget and a busy life. So, if you’re in a stalemate in your sex life, try these out and tell us if any of them worked for you!